When travelling, I often used (what to thought to be) a clever technique for distracting potential burglars. I would be using a big backpack and worried that someone might easily zip it open so I put, all the way around in a line, some *ahem* lady things. You know. So that it would be the first thing someone saw when they opened the bag. Hopefully they would be male and horrified by this sight and rapidly rethink his plan to steal from me.
That was the plan. I’ve never been stolen from while travelling but I’m not sure whether it was my clever distraction technique or luck.
Anyway, this one time, my friend and I were off backpacking around South East Asia for five weeks but we had different flights. He had had a stopover in Sri Lanka, been wined and dined and a beautiful hotel, swum in their beautiful pool and had a little nap. I, however, was changing in Kuwait and had a long eight hours in Kuwait Airport, with lots of massive duty free shops selling Toblerones and alcohol, neither of which I wanted.
For some reason, although I definitely wasn’t keen on staying in Kuwait longer than necessary, the announcement for my connecting flight wasn’t being made in the area I was sitting in. So I realised a bit late and had to make a dash for it. As I was running, I heard the announcements that they were waiting for one more passenger to board. That was me!
Desperately embarrassed, I arrived at the gate, panting and sweating and a stern faced lady said they were just about to close the gate and I had held everything up. I apologised profusely and handed over my backpack for her to search.
She zipped it open at double speed, her face a picture of grumpiness….
And all my *ahem* lady things spilled out all over her little desk.
She looked at me like she hated me.
I did a nervous little laugh and vaguely tried to explain how I did it to deter thieves.
“Well maybe you should have repacked it when you knew you were getting it searched,” she said, very very unamused….
Woops.
lazylauramaisey 
Posted by kindredspirit23 on December 15, 2012 at 23:12
Okay, I can’t “personally” top that one, but you reminded me…
When I went to Europe with my concert group in 1976, one teenager, a girl with definite female tastes, was told like the rest of us – one suitcase – now, she ended up ignoring the weight limit (or didn’t check it), however, at the inspection site, I remember her nearly screaming “No!” when they unlatched it. The suitcase literally exploded with clothes flying everywhere. She had had to sit on it to close it the first time. It was about 75 pounds of clothing in one small suitcase!
Lol
Scott