How fast do you chop vegetables?

This is a worry I’ve had for a while now. Are any of you out there the type of people who chop vegetables at five hundred miles an hour? And your hand is a blur. And all your vegetables are small and perfectly shaped? Anyone? Well, can you please show me how to do it please?

On Monday, I am taking a tentative step into the world of food and kitchens and chefs jackets and sharp knives. I am excited. Without a doubt. Because it’s a chance to see whether I really want to work with food properly or whether I just like cooking at home and should stay there.

It’s busy there. Very busy. It’s constant. There’s no standing about and looking around for things to do.

But do I chop vegetables fast enough?! I’m nervous that I don’t. When I pick up a vegetable, there’s no blurred hands or roses carved out of turnips. I just chop it with a knife at an average speed and hope the slices are even. You can definitely see the movement of my fingers. No blur.

I also don’t drink or smoke. At all. Which seems to be the biggest trait of most chefs. On my trial shift last week, the chef expressed surprise that I don’t smoke.

And wine. Wine is a thing I’d like to know about. It’s quite an impressive thing to know about wine. I’d love to be a sommelier. But I don’t want to drink it. I just want to know about it. I mean, what kind of chef doesn’t know about or drink wine?!

I also don’t do well with heat. I get sweaty and uncomfortable. And kitchens are sweaty places. Especially in the summer.

You see? You see how these things worry me?

Monday is the big day. Will I be able to chop a tomato fast enough? That is question on everyone’s (my) lips…

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15 responses to this post.

  1. I wish I could chop ANYTHING that fast. I’m too scared I’m going to slice a finger off if it do. I think I’m going to take a cooking class on knife chopping.

    Reply

    • Me too! I’ve been looking on the Cordon Bleu website for asges now, thinking about doing one of their short courses…. One day. When I’m a millionaire…

      Reply

  2. I used to work at a pub with fantastic food, the chef that created and made the award winning pies is a vegetarian. Good luck, I’m sure it’ll go well!

    Reply

  3. What is it with chefs smoking? They do it here too.

    So what are you doing on Monday? What’s it all about Alfie?

    I can’t chop fast so that probably makes you feel better.

    Reply

  4. Adventure, ho! I think if you can learn to cuss colorfully enough, they’ll overlook the rest. But you can only curse *down* the pecking order, unless you’re a very, very brave chicken.

    Reply

  5. ““”̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿’̿’̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε/̵͇̿̿/̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿’““Chopping!!! ““”̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿’̿’̵͇̿̿з=(•̪●)=ε/̵͇̿̿/̿ ̿ ̿ ̿ ̿’““

    That’s most of the time being spent whenever I am doing cooking!

    Now, you know how ‘fast’ I am chopping…LOL…

    Thank you for sharing and have a lovely weekend ahead! Cheers~ 😀

    Reply

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