My purse is a constant puzzle to me. There is absolutely no logic to the things I have in there. I can think of far more useful things that should be there which are instead on a shelf in the house somewhere. Let me demonstrate my point.
In my purse, there is:
An Unpaid Fare Notice from 06.06.10 at 05.57am for £2. I promised the kind bus driver I would go into a train station and pay it. I didn’t. I just kept it. Rude.
A raffle ticket with the number 56 on it. No idea.
A business card for a barrister. Do you call it a ‘business’ card?
A library membership card for Croydon Libraries. I do not live in Croydon.
A loyalty card for a frozen yoghurt place with one stamp on it.
10 air mail stickers.
A business card for a Swimming Development Manager. I’ve never contacted her.
A handwritten recipe for truffle sauce from the chef at Polpo.
A loyalty card for Waterstones with 5 stamps on it. The card expired in December 2012.
A card receipt for £52.40 for a meal I had in May. Another receipt for a haircut I got in May, one for my electric piano and one from the Post Office for a letter I posted in July. What is all that about? Why am I keeping them hanging around?
A Holland and Barratt reward card. I’ve never activated it or taken advantage of the rewards or anything. And still I carry it around.
An interesting little leaflet entitled ‘What Must I Do To Be Saved?’ that I picked up in a restaurant in Phoenix, Arizona. My favourite part is about what will happen to people who commute sins of a sexual nature. The punishment will be guilt, moral destruction, heartbreak, pain, devastation… And STDs.
11 passport photos.
A little card thing saying Lawra that Ella wrote for me when she first started learning to write. She also write me one saying robt, which I think means robot. But I’m not sure why. I keep it anyway.
A peice of paper with a name and phone number that I’ve never used. I’m not even sure who Sian is.
A loyalty card for Paper Passions with 3 stamps on it. I can guarantee I’m never going to fill that up.
Three notes of Vietnamese money that I think equate to about 45p.
A cashout ticket from a casino in Arizona for the grand total of $0.01.
A small Vietnamese flag badge thing.
Three letters from friends.
A room key card for the Rodeway Inn in Northern Houston.
A business card for Livingston 350 Cab Co.
My ticket to the Paralympics.
A business card for an estate agents for a place I lived in four and a half years ago.
Two more loyalty cards to coffee places that I rarely visit. I’ll never fill those up.
My National Trust membership card.
My student card from law school that has now been invalid for a whole year.
Two locker tokens for the swimming pool.
£1.30 in 10pences.
A Canadian 1 cent.
1 euro cent.
What is all this stuff for? All these stamp cards and receipts and air mail stickers? I think I’ll just shut the purse, put it away and wait for it to sort itself out….