Posts Tagged ‘throat sweets’

The virus and I

O, virus. You thought you could bring me down, didn’t you? You thought you could ruin me. You spent weeks ruining everyone around me before you got to me.

Well, virus, you had your work cut out with me! As soon as I felt a little tickle and a cough, I ate so many throat sweets, I forgot how to even spell sore throat.

On the advice of work colleagues, I got some echinacea tablets and took three a day to subdue you.

When the blocked nose arrived, I swore off dairy and took decongestant tablets and just about kept it under control. One morning I awoke totally unable to breathe through my nose but that was the only time you managed to interrupt my sleep.

I remembered people saying “feed a cold” and ate incessantly, from morning until evening.

Who knows if any of the old wives’ tales were true but I put my faith in them anyway. With a little help from some Beechams medicine and a bottle of cough syrup, I got through the worst of it without ever properly ‘having a cold.’

I transported all my medicine around with me constantly and whenever you appeared, in even the mildest form, I kappowed you with vitamins, I thwacked you with lemon and ginger tea, I karate chopped you with Strepsils throat sweets. The fight was on. And I was winning.

And now, virus, little sad virus, it is you who is regretting our meeting. You should never have arrived here. You should never have taken me on. For, instead of ravaging me, keeping me awake at night and making things unbearable before moving on to your next victim, I have stopped you in your tracks and struck you down.

Virus, your reign of terror stops here! I am equipped with echinacea and you shall not take me!