A boy I once loved

Once upon a time, when I was about 14 years old, I went to a Saturday drama group, in pursuit of my ultimate goal of being the best actress in the history of the world. Obviously.

There was a boy at this drama group, called Tommy. Tommy Sherlock. And I was obsessed. He filled my every waking thought. I thought he was the most beautiful boy I had ever seen. Ever.

The first week my friend and I went to the group, everyone was introducing themselves and he introduced himself as ‘God’. I thought this was the funniest thing I had heard anyone say in my life.

He had dark hair and blue eyes. He wore Adidas trainers and when my own trainers got too worn out, I bought the same pair that he had. He also wore those grandad socks that were fashionable for a while. The Pringle ones with diamonds on them, you know? So I wore them.

He played the lead male in a peice we worked on for a while. He had to sing at one point and of course he had a great voice. A girl called Sian played his girlfriend in the peice. I hated her. One week she wasn’t there so I stood in for her. When he pretended to put a ring on my finger, he had to touch my hand…. I wrote about it in my diary.

I thought Mrs Laura Sherlock sounded pretty good and worked out a signature I would use.

Now I’ll tell you the sum total of what I knew about him.

………..

Erm…… His name….. And what he looked like….

Erm…..

Erm….

Nope…. I got nothin’.

Seems a bit silly now.

The Strange English Language

The following is a guest blog from RuthJ at caderyan.com and was submitted to me via myblogguest.com. Enjoy!

 

The English language is a strange little thing. It contains the most words out of any other language, and though it is widely spoken throughout the world, it is actually one of the most difficult languages to learn.

Most other languages have rules associated with why the language is the way it is. Sentences are laid out to make sense and phonetics are easier to dissect. In English, there is no rhyme or reason to the way certain things are spelled or pronounced, and some of the words we use today don’t make sense as to why.

Languages were invented, which leaves it susceptible to error and confusion, and the English language is no exception. If we could go back in time when the English language was being created, we would have plenty of questions.

Did you ever notice that certain words would make more sense if used correctly with its counterparts? For example:

1. Why do we drive on parkways, yet park on driveways?

2. Why do we use garment bags to pack suits, yet we use suitcases to pack garments?

3. How come we play at a recital, yet we recite a play?

4. How come when we move something via a ship it’s called cargo, yet when we move something by car it’s called a shipment?

5. Why do we call people who ride bikes cyclists, but people who ride motorcycles bikers?

For the English language to make perfect sense, you would think that we would drive on driveways and park on parkways and that we would call those who ride bikes bikers and those who rode motorcycles cyclists. Instead, we do things backwards.

Then there are those items that involve numbers that simply don’t make sense. For example:

1. Why is it called a pair of pants when you only get one?

2. Why is first-degree murder worse than third-degree murder, but first-degree burns are less serious than third-degree burns?

3. Why do we call it a television set if we only get one?

We also have words that follow one rule but not for others. For example:

1. How come the day breaks but never falls, yet night falls but never breaks?

2. How come a king rules a kingdom, but a queen doesn’t rule a queendom?

And then there are just certain questions we wish we had answers to, including:

1. Why does the word lisp have an s in it? Was it some type of cruel joke?

2. How come there is no synonym for the word synonym?

3. Why are deer and moose the same for both singular and plural versions?

4. What was the purpose of spelling read and read or lead and lead the same but making them have two different phonetics?

5. How come you can turn a light on, off or out, but you can’t turn it in?

6. How can you be head over heels? Aren’t you already head over heels? Shouldn’t it be heels over head?

7. Why can -ough be pronounced seven different ways?

Unfortunately we may never know the answer to some of these questions, and the English language will continue to be a mystery to everyone.

 

Robert Hunt is a writer and linguist. He has studied the forms and details of many different languages. Robert has recently enrolled in Accent Pros accent classes to learn how to pronounce words with different accents.